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The Hardcore Self Help Podcast with Duff the Psych

This is a podcast dedicated to answering your questions about mental health, anxiety, depression, relationships, sex, and life WITHOUT psychobabble BS. I am Dr. Robert Duff, a psychologist from Southern California, but I'm also a regular dude who legitimately wants to help out. I wrote the best selling books Hardcore Self Help: F**k Depression and Hardcore Self Help: F**K Anxiety. Those are available at http://hardcoreselfhelp.com
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The Hardcore Self Help Podcast with Duff the Psych
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Now displaying: Page 2
Sep 8, 2023

Hello, all! I hope that you are staying healthy and safe. In this episode, I cover two very interesting questions.

In the first, someone has been through almost every treatment for depression and anxiety under the sun, yet they still struggle. Their therapist suggested that they may be on the autism spectrum and the person is wondering whether it would be useful to get an evaluation. We discuss the potential benefits as well as how to go about finding (and affording) an evaluation.

Next, someone has PTSD from their partner's PTSD reactions. Their partner is a war veteran with multiple brain injuries and the question-asker is wondering how they can stay afloat mentally when their partner does not get help. We talk about ways to avoid codependence, how to establish boundaries, and when to call it quits.

As always, you can send me questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com and find the show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode365

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This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Rather than letting your thoughts stay swirling around in your mind, get them out by talking to a licensed therapist. Try BetterHelp today and get 10% off your first month at http://betterhelp.com/duff

Also, don't forget to check out my new shop. I'm putting out new designs all the time including this awesome mug:

Funny Halloween Mental Health Mug Abilify Potion Unique image 1

Sep 1, 2023

Hello, friends! I hope you're treating yourselves well. In this episode, I dive into two compelling listener questions that touch on complex emotional states and mental health diagnoses.

First up, we discuss what it means to be diagnosed with PTSD with "schizophrenic episodes." If you've ever been confused by mental health jargon or diagnoses, this segment will provide some clarity. We'll break down the DSM criteria for PTSD and explore the possibility of psychotic symptoms within the framework of trauma.

Our second question is a deeply emotional one. It's about the sudden disappearance of body dysmorphia and low self-esteem following the death of an abusive parent. Can such a significant life event dramatically shift one's self-image? We'll delve into the complexities of grief, closure, and self-perception in this intriguing discussion.

As always, your engagement keeps this show going. Send your questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com for a chance to be featured in future episodes. For full show notes, head to duffthepsych.com/episode364.

Aug 25, 2023

Hello, friends! I hope you are treating yourselves well. In this episode, we dive deep into two thought-provoking listener questions.

Our first discussion revolves around a listener who's grappling with a profound fear of wasps, known as spheksophobia. This phobia has had a significant impact on their quality of life, especially during the summer. We delve into the nature of specific phobias, their prevalence, and debunk some common misconceptions about wasps. Moreover, we explore potential strategies for addressing and managing such fears, emphasizing the role of exposure therapy and the significance of understanding one's fear hierarchy.

The second question opens a window into the world of a couple navigating the challenges of moving in together. One partner has relocated from a cherished home, and both are experiencing the typical growing pains of cohabitation for the first time. We discuss the importance of communication, curiosity, and compromise in this new chapter of their relationship. By establishing routines, rituals, and shared spaces, they can create an environment that feels like home to both, while also setting aside time for individual activities to foster a deeper bond.

Your questions always bring valuable insights to our conversations. If there's a question or topic on your mind, feel free to send it over to duffthepsych@gmail.com. For full show notes, head to http://duffthepsych.com/episode363.

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Life doesn't come with a road map. Whether it is navigating changes in your relationship or figuring out how to use exposure to conquer your anxiety, BetterHelp may be just what you are looking for. Get professional help conveniently and quickly plus 10% off at http://betterhelp.com/duff 

Aug 11, 2023

Hello, everyone! I hope you are doing super well. As always, I really appreciate your attention. A special thank you to everyone that has left feedback for me about the show. Very helpful. In this weeks episode, I tackle the following questions:

  • Could my symptoms be PMDD and if so, how do I get help?
  • What can I do about my ex that is spreading harmful lies about me?

As always, you can send me questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com and find the show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode362

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This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. If you could use the support of a therapist to help you navigate life's challenge. Check out BetterHelp and get connected to a licensed therapist quickly, entirely online. Visit http://betterhelp.com/duff for 10% off your first month.

This episode is also sponsored by OneSkin. If you're like me and would like a simple skincare routine that is backed by clinical research, then OneSkin is for you. Visit http://oneskin.co and use the code "duff" for 15% off. 

Aug 4, 2023

Hello, all!

In this episode, I answer the following awesome listener questions.

  • I have successfully been treated for cancer, but I can't stop looking at research and personal accounts online for fear that it may come back. How can I stop?
  • How do weight loss medications like Ozempic help reduce the psychological addiction to food?

Please give me feedback on the show at this link: https://forms.gle/TGx4puKucMJKjSNz7

As always, you can send me questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com and find the show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode361

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Today's episode is sponsored by Mindbloom. Get $100 off your first at-home ketamine treatment for depression and anxiety at http://mindbloom.com/duff with the promo code duff.

Jul 28, 2023

Hello, friends! I hope you're staying safe from the heat and generally taking good care of yourselves. Today, I have two awesome listener questions.

The first comes from someone that left her job as a teacher because she was burned out. However, now she finds herself in a difficult situation without insurance or a longterm steady income. I provide advice regarding resources for inexpensive and free therapy. I also talk about different resources available to someone in a situation like this and explain how Maslow's heirarchy of needs explains why the person should focus on basic needs before trying to answer big questions about their life and sexuality.

The second question is from a mother with two autistic children and a mother with dementia. She is looking for advice about how to take care of herself without abandoning her family. I provide a variety of ideas for resources that would allow her to have more help and freedom.

As always, you can send me questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com and find the show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode360

Jul 21, 2023

Hello, friends! I hope life is treating you well.

In today's episode, we're going to dive into two more insightful listener questions:

Our first question comes from a listener who's struggling with their spouse's constant engagement with their phone. The impact is such that it seems to supersede any conversation or interaction they might have. They even go so far as to joke that they might be better off texting their spouse, despite being in the same room. We'll delve into this challenge, discussing potential strategies for addressing screen-time issues within relationships, communication tactics, and steps to reclaim mutual attention and presence.

Our second question is from a listener navigating the complexities of depression and anxiety treatment. They've been considering ketamine therapy and have concerns about its application, specifically the difference between IV and oral administration, potential lasting effects, and the overall experience. They're particularly interested in hearing about personal experiences with ketamine therapy, including potential side effects and long-term benefits. We'll unravel the science behind ketamine treatment for depression and anxiety, exploring the potential pros and cons, the lasting effects, and the considerations one should have in mind when deciding on this treatment approach.

As always, I appreciate your questions and engagement with the show. You can send your questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com and find the show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode359.

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Sponsor:

This epsiode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Life doesn't come with a guidebook, but you don't have to go it alone. Enlist the help of a licensed therapist entirely online at http://betterhelp.com/duff

Jul 7, 2023
Hello, friends! I hope you're all doing fantastic.
 
In today's episode, we delve into the following awesome listener questions:
 
Our first question comes from a listener who has been dealing with a challenging relationship with food. They described waking up each day caught in a cycle of remorse over their previous night's eating and anxiety about what the new day will bring. They also mentioned the negative impact this issue has on their relationships and social life. Although they've begun therapy, their current therapist has admitted this specific problem is outside of their expertise. Together, we'll explore this struggle, discussing possible steps toward understanding and addressing problematic eating habits and how to find the right professional help to navigate this journey.
 
Our second question is from a loyal listener who's been with us for three years. They're struggling with setting long-term goals due to anxiety. They aspire to move overseas with their partner in the next 5-10 years but are being held back by worries such as the stability of their relationship and financial concerns. We'll unpack the complexities of setting long-term goals while dealing with anxiety, offering strategies to establish realistic objectives without feeling overwhelmed, and ways to manage the uncertainties that naturally come with future planning.
 
As always, I appreciate your questions and engagement with the show. You can send your questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com and find the show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode358.
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This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. If you are looking for some assistance in finding your direction in life, consider enlisting the help of a licensed remote therapist at http://betterhelp.com/duffthepsych
 
Jun 30, 2023

Hello, friends! I hope you're all doing great.

In today's episode, we dive into the following awesome listener questions:

Our first question comes from a listener who's considering whether to continue their journey with antidepressant medication. They've been told by their doctor that most people stay on these medications for life, but they're not sure if this path is right for them. They're grappling with how to gauge if the medication is still necessary or if their mental health has improved enough to consider discontinuing it. We will delve into this complex issue, discussing ways to assess the effectiveness of antidepressants, the potential risks and benefits of long-term use, and how to make informed decisions about your mental health treatment plan.

Our second question is from a long-time listener who has been struggling with feeling comfortable during intimate moments with their partner. Despite feeling sexy when alone, the listener finds it challenging to relax and enjoy intimacy with their partner, possibly due to a decade-long journey with infertility and miscarriages. Now surgically sterile, the listener is looking for ways to reclaim their sex life and feel comfortable in their own skin during intimate encounters. We will explore ways to navigate this emotional terrain, discussing how past experiences can impact present relationships and strategies for fostering healthy and satisfying intimacy.

As always, feel free to send your questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com. You can find the show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode357.

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This episode is sponsored by ONE SKIN. If you are looking to reverse the impact of aging on your skin, check out this simple skincare product developed by several PhD-level scientists. Get 15% off your order at http://oneskin.co with the offer code DUFF

 

Jun 22, 2023
Hello, friends! I hope you're all doing great.
 
In today's episode, we dive into the following awesome listener questions:
 
Our first question comes from a concerned parent whose son was diagnosed with schizophrenia eight years ago. At the time, they didn't agree with the diagnosis due to a variety of circumstantial factors, but now they recognize that their son does indeed have schizophrenia. They are seeking guidance on how to help him understand his condition and learn to manage it without relying on medication. They also ask for recommendations on therapists who specialize in non-medication treatment options. We will navigate this sensitive topic, discussing ways to approach the conversation and exploring non-medication treatment strategies for schizophrenia.
 
Our second question is from a listener who's been struggling with assertiveness and self-respect, often prioritizing others' needs over their own to avoid conflict. This listener also has ADHD which exacerbates the issue, making it challenging for them to communicate effectively during moments of conflict due to executive functioning overload. They seek advice on accepting their shortcomings, cultivating self-love, and prioritizing their own needs without fear of pushing others away. We will discuss the importance of setting boundaries, effective communication strategies, and ways to build self-respect while managing ADHD.
 
As always, feel free to send your questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com. You can find the show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode356.
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This episode is brought to you by Mindbloom, the leader in at-home ketamine therapy. Get $100 off your first treatment at http://mindbloom.com/duff with the code duff at checkout.
 
This episode is also brought to you by Betterhelp. Take control of your mental health with the help of a licensed therapist, completely online at http://betterhelp.com/duff.
 
Jun 16, 2023

Hello, friends! I hope everyone is doing well.

In today's episode, we dive into the following awesome listener questions:

Our first question comes from a listener whose partner was diagnosed with ADHD in childhood. They're now wondering if they might also have Bipolar II, as they experience random bouts of depression and "good days" that may potentially be hypomanic episodes. The listener questions if these mood swings could be catalyzed by situational factors or if they are indeed random. We'll unpack the complexities of distinguishing between ADHD and Bipolar II, discussing the different symptoms, overlaps, and possible courses of action to consider.

Our second question comes from a listener who's been grappling with deep existential thoughts about the concept of the "soul," particularly relating to individuals who die by suicide. They wonder about possible repercussions in potential afterlife scenarios, despite not being particularly religious. They ponder on possibilities like reincarnation, memory erasure, or even punishment. In response to this question, we'll delve into the intersections of spirituality, mental health, and coping with such existential concerns, while emphasizing the importance of empathy and compassion in our understanding of such tragic events.

As always, if you have questions or topics you'd like discussed on the show, please send them to duffthepsych@gmail.com. Be sure to check out the show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode355.

Jun 9, 2023

Hello, friends! In this episode, I tackle two great listener questions about relationships. The first one comes from someone with borderline personality disorder who would like to figure out if and when they should reveal this to potential partners. The second question comes all the way from Columbia and features someone who is concerned about how enmeshed her boyfriend is with his mother.

As always, you can send me questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com and find the show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode354 

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This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. If you are looking for support and perspective, fill out a quick questionnaire at http://betterhelp.com/duff to get quickly matched with a licensed therapist and receive 10% off your first month!

Jun 2, 2023
Hello, friends! I hope you are all doing well.
 
Our first question comes from a listener who reached out to express their appreciation for the show, my course, and books. They share a childhood experience of being in a dodge car accident where they were hit from behind, resulting in a significant lump on their head and feelings of sickness and disorientation. They recently heard me speak about frontal lobe damage and its potential effects, which resonated with them. They also suspect they may be undiagnosed autistic. They are concerned about the possibility of having sustained a brain injury and whether an MRI at their current age (31) would reveal any long-term effects. This uncertainty has brought up feelings of betrayal and neglect. I provide insight into the likelihood of detecting an old brain injury on an MRI and offer guidance on the next steps to gain clarity and peace of mind.
 
Moving on to our second question, a listener in their late twenties shares their struggle with assessing whether to judge people based on how they treat others or solely on how they treat them. They describe ending relationships with men who exhibited disrespectful behavior towards other women, as well as navigating concerns about a close platonic female friend who has made questionable moral choices. They ponder whether to judge people based on their life choices or patterns, and if it's necessary to align values with others or accept them as they are. I delve into the complexities of these situations, emphasizing the importance of personal boundaries, unconditional positive regard, and self-reflection in determining how to approach relationships.
 
As always, I appreciate your support and engagement with the show. You can send your questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com, and find the show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode353.
 
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This episode is sponsored by Mindbloom, the leader in at-home ketamine treatment. If you are struggling with depression and anxiety, try ketamine treatment from the safety and comfort of your own home and get $100 off at http://mindbloom.com/duff with the code duff at checkout.
May 26, 2023

Hello, friends! It's been an interesting week for me, which I address at the start of the episode. From there, I share with you a previous episode of the show that I wanted to make sure that you've heard! This is all about staying focused. It's a great episode for anyone that might struggle with ADHD or simply has trouble concentrating from time to time. Here are the tips I cover:

  1. Limit distractions
  2. Adjust your space - physical and digital
  3. Do NOT multitask
  4. Practice mindfulness meditation frequently
  5. Journal/Plan every day
  6. Check your planner at least 3x per day
  7. Set yourself up with an outline before leaving a task
  8. Keep a notebook nearby for impulsive thoughts that can wait
  9. Force yourself to prioritize
  10. If you take it out, put it back
  11. Don't procrastinate - if it takes less than a minute do it (unless you're in the middle of something else)
  12. Keep a place for your small things
  13. Make a mise en place for your workplaces
  14. Use neutral inputs to satisfy your attention hunger (white noise etc)
  15. Take breaks for movement
  16. Abort when you're in to deep
  17. Work in shifts
  18. Don't use your partner as a coach
  19. Use the solution that works, whether it's perfect or not
  20. Study yourself

This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Don't forget to take care of yourself, so that you can keep being a great support for others. Try online therapy and get 10% off your first month at http://betterhelp.com/duff

As always, you can send me questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com and find the show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode352

 

May 19, 2023

Hello, friends! This is a short and sweet episode. No ads today, but I have two awesome listener questions. 

First, I tackle a question from someone that feels the end of their relationship is inevitable due to moving to another state and they are already struggling with feelings of grief.

The second question is from someone with a background of trauma that wants advice about how to deal with their friend's angry outbursts.

I hope you enjoy!

 

As always, you can send me questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com and find the show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode351

 

May 12, 2023

Hello, friends! I hope you are all doing well. Special shout out to the moms out there this week! In this episode, I two awesome listener questions. 

Our first question comes from a listener who has been enjoying the podcast and requests an episode focused on "daddy issues." They express curiosity about the causes and potential solutions surrounding this concept. In response to this inquiry, we will delve into the complexities of "daddy issues," examining various contributing factors and discussing potential strategies for healing and personal development.

Moving on to our second question, a long-time listener writes in for the first time, sharing their ongoing struggle with severe social anxiety. They describe how their anxiety often leads to dissociation during conversations, causing them to make impulsive decisions to end interactions prematurely. Despite trying conventional treatments such as CBT, exposure therapy, medication, and group therapy, the listener feels disheartened by the lack of progress and wonders if there are other options available. We'll explore alternative approaches and offer insights on how to navigate social anxiety in a more empowering way.

As always, you can send me questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com and find the show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode350

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Today's episode is brought to you by Mindbloom, the leader in at-home ketamine therapy for depression and anxiety. You can get $100 off your first treatment at http://mindbloom.com/duff with the code "duff". 

May 5, 2023
Hello, friends! In this episode, I answer two listener questions.
 
The first question is from a listener who has been with her boyfriend for over 10 years, but suspects he is a narcissist and compulsive liar. She believes that a car accident at 17, which resulted in physical injuries as well as a TBI, may have stunted his development. The listener is struggling with her boyfriend's lying behavior and wonders if he's lying about their relationship too. She asks how to deal with the lying and gaslighting, and how to tell if her boyfriend's love for her is genuine.
 
In the second question, a listener shares her concerns about her younger sister's emotional development, given their mother's unpredictable and intense reactions to normal child behavior. The listener worries about her sister's mental health and emotional growth, and wants her mother to be more gentle and understanding towards her. However, the listener is struggling with confronting her mother due to past fear of her reactions. She asks for advice on how to approach the situation.
 
As always, you can send your questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com, and find the show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode349.
 
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This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Don't lose yourself in the shuffle. Get linked up with a licensed therapist completely online and get 10% off your first month at http://betterhelp.com/duff 
Apr 28, 2023
Like most of the world, I have been obsessed with AI tools such as ChatGPT. However, I think they are more than a gimmick. I have been using them every single day to help improve my work and personal life. In this episode, I walk you through the ways that I use ChatGPT and other AI models and I also provide you with some ideas about how you can use them to improve your own life and mental health.
 
As always, you can send me questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com and find the show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode348
 
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp - if you are in a position where you put yourself last and other first, you may be at risk of burnout. Get the help and perspective that you need from a licensed professional at betterhelp.com/duff for 10% off. 
Apr 21, 2023
Hello, friends! This one is a bit of a doozy. Please be aware that the subject matter is somewhat more intense than other episodes recently. In this one, I tackle the following listener questions:
  • Should I get treatment for my excessive concerns about germs and contamination? How can I re-engage socially with the continuing concerns about COVID-19?
  • My partner violated my consent and sexual boundaries repeatedly, but they seem sorry and I still love them. What can I do?

As always, you can send me questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com and find the show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode347

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Sponsors:

This episode is brought to you by Mindbloom - try at-home Ketamine therapy on your terms and get $100 off your first treatment at mindbloom.com/duff with the promo code duff.

This episode is also brought to you by Air Doctor. If you are in the market for an amazing air purifier, check out airdoctorpro.com and use the promo code duff for a whopping 40% off!

Apr 14, 2023
Hello, friends! In this episode, I tackle one awesome question from a listener. This person has treatment resistant depression and bipolar. Their mania is well-controlled, but they need a higher level of treatment for the depression. Their psychiatrist suggested either ketamine of electroconvulsive therapy, so in this episode, I break down everything you need to know about these treatments.
 
As always, you can send me questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com.
 
Apr 7, 2023

Hello, friends! I hope that you are taking good care of yourselves. We are back to the Q&A format this week with the following amazing listener questions:

  • I am stable on bipolar medications, but I hate the side effects. What can I do?
  • My CBT therapy just seems to worsen my mood. How can I make it more helpful?

As always, you can send me questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com

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This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Get affordable counseling from a licensed therapist completely online at http://betterhelp.com/duff 

Mar 31, 2023

Hey, friends! This episode is a little different. Rather than taking listener questions, I decided to share something that is working really well for me. I take you through a five-step process for doing what I like to call "self-therapy." This is usually done while I am in the car or walking the dog. I highly suggest you also talk out loud to yourself like a weirdo.

FYI: The website is still under construction. It broke badly and we need to rebuild it. It should be up and runing again soon. In the meantime, if you'd like to send me a question for an upcoming episode of the show, please shoot an email to duffthepsych@gmail.com

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This episode is brought to you by AirDoctor. AirDoctor is an amazing air purifier that works quickly enough to circulate the air in an average room four times per hour. It also traps particles as small as 0.003 microns in size. Head over to http://airdoctorpro.com and use the promo code DUFF for up to 40% off (A value of up to $300).

Mar 24, 2023

Hello, friends! Huge apologies - the website is currently down. I hope that it is up again soon! In this episode, I answer the following questions:

  • I dissociate whenever I try to talk about my feelings. How can I overcome this?
  • Bad things seem to happen after I masturbate. Am I causing bad things to happen?

As always, you can send me questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com and find the show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode343 (once the website is back up).

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Sponsor for this episode is Betterhelp. If you are like the individuals in this episode and could use some help with personal exploration, try professional therapy done completely online. Head over to betterhelp.com/duff for 10% off your first month.

I mention a resource for looking at spurious correlations in the episode. You can find that at https://www.tylervigen.com/spurious-correlations

 

Mar 17, 2023

Hello, everyone. I hope you are treating yourselves well. Q&A episode this week featuring the following great listener questions:

  • I have had severe depression and suicidal ideation for the past 25 years and nothing is working. Aside from going into the hospital or an IOP program, what can I do?
  • Can you talk about how the thyroid is related to mood and mental health?

As always, you can send me questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com and find the show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode342

No sponsors this week, so be sure to go check out my author page to find more resources!

Mar 10, 2023

Hello, friends! Short and sweet Q&A episode here. Before jumping into the questions, I share a couple strategies that are working well for me right now. Then, I cover the following questions:

  • As a teenager, will my therapist have to report if I tell them about my parents abusing me?
  • I am a therapist and found a new position that will allow me to make a better living, but it means my fees will increase. How can I deal with this?

As always, you can send me questions to duffthepsych@gmail.com and find the show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode341

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This episode of Hardcore Self Help is sponsored by BetterHelp.

If you are in a mental health slump, consider reaching out to a licensed professional to help. BetterHelp has a large counselor network and you can begin chatting with someone very quickly. Check out betterhelp.com/duff to get 10% off your first month.

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